Recently I’ve become aware of polarizing attitudes with respect to RLV. There are some out there who deride it as being a crutch, replacing RP, being a tool of lazy dominants and overall detrimental to BDSM.
To an extent this is understandable, I’ve seen some appalling uses of RLV. Then again I’ve seen appalling uses of motor cars, bicycles, hammers…see where I’m going here?
It’s not the tools you use, it’s how you use them. Now I’m not setting myself up and an authority on RLV and how it can be used as a tool to enhance your SL BDSM experience; this is how I do things though.
Before I get to that, though, some defining of terms.
RLV is a tool for bondage and control, so I"m not going to be talking doms and subs, I’m going to be talking tops and bottoms. Domination and submission is a completely different subject and RLV will not help you there. It can enhance activities surrounding D/s, but if you don’t have the foundations RLV will do you no good.
The top is the main protagonist of the scene. I use the term top specifically because it has little to do with domination. One can still be submissive i nature and in act yet still be a top in a scene. This is an important distinction because bondage can have absolutely no bearing on D/s, some of us just like bondage.
The top is the pilot for the ride. It’s the top’s job to control the environment for and around the bottom and that leads us nicely to the…
Just as a top needn’t necessarily be dominant, a bottom needn’t necessarily be submissive. What the bottom does do though is surrender some control to the top of the scene. The bottom essentially straps in and allows the top to take him or her for a ride.
That does not mean that the bottom’s role is a passive one, oh no. I don’t know many tops who like unresponsive bottoms. The bottom’s role is to react, respond give the top something to work with. It’s a bit of a balancing act for the bottom as there is a risk that topping from the bottom may occur; I’d go in to that in more detail but I’m trying not to lose focus.
Next up – RLV Tools of the Trade